As I awake

Nov. 2nd, 2005 10:21 am
jstmealways: Rainbow Graphics (Default)
I lay in bed wondering if this day is going to be any different than yesterday. Is there a hope that things will become more clear in my head. I look around me and see chaos. Self-destruction. I need to find my path again a path that at one time was so clear to me. I know now how much I want to get done and all of the goals that I have set for myself and I am wondering when I will be able to accomplish them all. I have completely allowed myself to get off of my path and to have been mislead. I need to focus on work and school and make my goals reality. My dreams at night are full of wonder and awe. I wish my everyday life could be anything like the dreams that I am having. I awaken in the morning feeling refreshed and relaxed a feeling that is so new to me. I stand in the shower allowing the water to wash off of me all of the bad in my life allowing me to start each day anew. Everyday is another new beginning. Another day to have a chance to leave your footprint. I am happy, honestly happy and alone. I can see this now. I like it this way. I like knowing that I can succeed in life with no one else by my side. I have a few wonderful friends and those that I can confide in which is all I need at this point. Everything else is just a distraction. These glorious thoughts always come a few days to late.. but better late than never..

I feel alive again.. so those of you who try and bring me down and like to pry into a persons personal life and talk about it behind my back FUCK OFF!!! You are no friend to me.. you are not needed in my life.. go away!! Please!! I beg you to just leave my life alone.. I am allowed to make whatever decisions I want in life and you are no one to be talking about my life to anyone else... live your own life.. leave mine alone.


jstmealways: Rainbow Graphics (Default)

November 2009

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